Today was my day to get things "in order". I met a new therapist who seems to understand that things were bad before the attack and now things are just a horrible!
Next, Zone 5 precinct to press charges. The investigator seemed helpful and concerned for the most part but was a but surprised when I mentioned the doctor put me on major anti-anxiety medication and I have not returned to work. Hummm...
Then, the phone calls. HR rep called- I need to talk to an adjuster to get my medical costs paid; I can't just see who I want, I need to go where they send me; Unless I've already seen one, in which case I need to give my statement to the adjuster and they may need to contact the doctor... Worker's Comp lawyer- We need to set up an appointment to get the story down and see if we have a case; and next week won't work for him, how 'bout Wednesday? Afternoon? Fine. (I feel like he's a lawyer...)
By 3pm I was ready to be alone and not talk about it. I sent Ophie to the neighbors' and turned on my appletv to catch up on reruns. I tried, at the urging of my doctors, to delay dosing until I can get a feel for how I am doing each day. If I can get through the morning without a crying spell, I'm good. By lunch, even better. Unfortunately, about 3 pm was the tipping point.
Depression began to set in. It quickly turned to panic; sporadic breathing and uncontrollable shaking. The medication is pretty fast acting but it took about 20 minutes for me to calm down.
I called for reinforcements. Emily and Casey came over to snuggle. Casey has turned into a gentle, caring little lady who could make anyone smile. She gently rubbed my back just like my dad used to when I'd stay home from school. She showed me pictures of her trip to Six Flags and was so funny. The medication began to do it's job.
Tomorrow is another day. No plans. Just working on me.
I wonder if my participant will be in the office for her bi-weekly meeting.