What was I thinking: bathroom project day 2

We have made some headway on our bathroom. I started to pull off the the first wall of the shower tiles to find a really thick backer board stuck to the tiles- I mean forever bonded to these twelve inch squares. I tried to do one tile at a time but that was not going to happen. The entire wall came together... I guess that makes it easier?

I've got most of the wood framing the tiles off of the wall. As we started the second and biggest wall- RODE BLOCK! There is no backer board behind this tile? It is tiled directly to the wall, as far as I can tell. Not great. Each time we tried to pry the tile from the wall, we made a new dent in the wall.

Now, Eli used to support my idea of re-doing the bathroom, but took a "hands off approach." After a week of confessing that he was no longer intimidated by the project, he took over the project today. I guess that makes it easier for me...

Another chance

I need just one more chance at a baby.

We have been trying for a couple months now. My PCP, who met me once, suggested we wait nine months; my OB who knows me from last year is very excited that we are trying again. Last year was devastating. I hope I never lose another baby.

Every month, we get our hopes up. I stop with the coffee and... that's my only "vice" really- if you can call it that! I tell more and more people that we are "trying". I come up with new reasons why this month would be better than last month to get pregnant. I research the due date to see who's birthday the baby would be born around. I become that crazy lady that talks about the cluster of cells in her belly she can't feel but "knows" is there...

Every time I get my period, I feel like I did last year. I feel like we are never going to be parents. All my friends who have been through this tell me that it gets better; that it will happen one day. What if it doesn't?

What was I thinking?

So... I may have started a new project... I'm re-doing our spare bathroom. (Insert post title here!)

I've been reading home improvement things on-line, like Young House Love (check 'em out), and every Saturday I try to watch This Old House on PBS and pretend that my dad is watching with me like we used to when I was little. So, of course I got this crazy idea that between my two jobs and crafting, "I can just go ahead and re-do the bathroom."

Here is the plan: The tile HAS to go! It's not falling apart or anything... It is just, not pretty... I mean, really! In this particular bathroom, the floor might be a little... um... WEAK! Every time you sit down, you pray you don't keep going! The contractor said,"The sub floor is in good condition, so if the floor gives out, you'll only fall a few inches." Reassuring, I know.

All the fixtures are in good shape. I'll be re-using the toilet, the shower base (after a nice cleaning) and the sink. All I really have to do is the tile, the floor and the paint! Famous last words, right?



Here are our befores :)

Real homemade!

Last night we had a friend over for dinner. The menu was pasta, bread and broccoli with iced tea to drink.

Eli and I made pesto from the basil in our garden and acorns we froze last fall. Of course we had to boil the nuts to make them digest-able. To make garlic bread, I took a loaf and sliced 1 inch pieces, mixed room temp butter with our garden basil and rosemary and a store bought garlic. Mix and spread- then broil until ready. The tea was mint and pineapple sage- both from the garden and a little dried stevia from last years garden.

It was great. And home-grown. I can't wait for our next homemade dinner!

late stage adolescent angst

Everyone rebels at some point. And of course some rebellions can last longer than others. But at what point does it lose it's momentum and become opposition for opposition's sake?

Growing up, my parents always gave us as much information as they could and let it be known that the decision we make is our decision. My sister does the same with her girls except they call it "You're not the boss of me." To this day, I still ask my parents' opinions when making decisions.

It seems that some make their decisions based on the opposition. They think they know what others would say and they say the opposite. Is this adult angst? It reminds me of what I did when I was an adolescent... At some point it becomes less cute and more hurtful.

Rebellion is supposed to be something you stand for, something in which you believe with all you have. But what you say has lost it's impact on others because of your quick rebut and lack of scrutiny.

I am a fan of devil's advocate. I often give two opposing sides when offering advice because it is meant to inform and not persuade. But when only offering the opposing side all the time as your view, it quickly becomes useless for the opponent.

If you really want to change the world, if you want to save others, may I suggest honey? I hear you catch more flies that way. But if the sour scent of vinegar is all you offer to those you think are damned, I wish to not partake in your offerings.

Signed,
Sister.

Nesting

I went to the doctor a few weeks ago for a "physical". I had it set up before the last surgery but postponed it for after- just for peace of mind, I guess.

I told the female doctor about all the surgeries and the miscarriage. She said I should wait a year from surgery to get pregnant. She told me, "Spend some time with your husband; travel; NEST!" Really? Really, lady? You don't know me... "We've been together for nine years; married for three. We've traveled all over this country. We were ready to have a baby LAST year! (insert TEARS)." I spared her the details of the baby's room that we've had planned since we bought the house, and the fact that we've had our baby named since we got engaged...

Needless to say, I argued her down to six to nine months! But in my head it's like three to six... ;)

I need something to occupy my time or I'm never gonna make it THAT long! All I can think of doing is setting up the spare room for easy transition to baby room, crocheting toys for babies, and cleaning the house!

We'll see how long I can wait....

Paid in full!!

Our benefit show went really well. So many people came out; a lot of people who have made a difference in my recovery! I have been so lucky to have so many people who love and care for me in my life.

Most bands covered a Beatles song for me and I even got a No Doubt and a Fernandina mix-in! I sold a lot of my crafts and the shirts were a hit! It was a GREAT night- and a great morning after counting our funds!

The next week I called the hospital to see if they would discount my bill if I paid a large sum- AND THEY DID!!! We were able to pay it off in full!!!

Thank you to everyone who helped out- financially and emotionally!!
XOXOXO

Fillin' up that colon!!!

The benefit show my friends are throwing to help pay my medical bills is TOMORROW!!! I am so excited. We have a bunch of friends coming in from out of town to party with us. We have made shirts for sale. We have art for sale. I want this colon FULL!! :)

I love my friends!!

XOXOX

5 BANDS, $5!!

For more info, check this out!:
http://www.containmenttheoryrecords.com/shows.html